Archive for the Dangerous and Unsavory ideas that are possibly harmful to the weak-mided and overly simplistic and religious Category

Once in a Blue Agave Moon: And Now we Begin Again.

Posted in Dangerous and Unsavory ideas that are possibly harmful to the weak-mided and overly simplistic and religious, Much Too Good For Children, Once in a Blue Agave Moon, Polyamory, Possibly Dangerous to Everyone on October 13, 2018 by dreamlanddancing

Chapter 28

 

As the others enjoyed their coffee, Chiana produced a vaporizer and the now famous Dragon Drops to help set the stage for the meal that was to follow. 

After the gluttony of the previous night, Elliott was reasonably sure that today’s first meal would be best appreciated for its quality, rather than sheer quantity.

Melon, Mango, and grapefruit. All locally grown and a homemade “approximation” of prosciutto gave everyone a chance to prepare themselves for a meal to begin the first day of the rest of their lives.

After being told about The Fruit of the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil, neither Elliott nor Chiana had much of a clue about what to expect. 

They had tried LSD, Peyote, Mescaline, Ayahuasca and Psilocybin many years before, and had even used the local mushrooms twice since establishing The Colony.

With such an imposing name, it would be difficult to live up to anybody’s expectations were it not for the fact that, once ingested it would so far exceed them that there was about zero chance that they would be disappointed.

As they consumed their sumptuously restrained repast, Jed and Leigh-Anne took the lead in attempting to prepare them for this most auspicious of occasions.

“Although you will probably experience the briefly unpleasant sensations of almost flu-like symptoms and a very low-grade fever like the onset of virtually all psychedelics, in addition to an initial feeling of minor disorientation, bordering on dysphoria, when it passes, you will not feel as if you were being catapulted into some surrealistic fifth dimension, or anything that you would be inclined to label as hallucinations.” Leigh-Ann’s demeanor was part clinical nurse, part tour-guide, and part merry prankster.

“But you can rest assured that before you have any real chance to feel any sense of disappointment that you will be presented with some sort of enigmatic observation or vision that will precede the systematic deconstruction of essentially everything you have taken for granted; not as an illusion, but rather as if you are observing successive layers of illusion being lifted.” Jed was affectionately gentle and reassuring as he alternately shifted his attentions to Chiana and Elliott.

“You may be reminded of the Dance of the Seven Veils. As long as you don’t try to control what is presented to you, it’s more like a philosophical strip-tease…” Leigh-Ann’s words trailed off as she smiled and slightly shook her head, obviously amused by her own turn of phrase.

The systematic deconstruction of every aspect of your known world is not like a continuous series of fun-house mirrors, nor was it likely to be a horror show either, given the present company’s familiarity with each other, which more or less precluded any serious concerns for anyone’s physical or mental safety.

“And never forget…what starts as well as what happens between friends stays between friends…” Rebel interjected almost as if she had been reading this narrative as it was being written, (which was presumed to be happening as the event was unfolding…something of a stylistic ouroboros….).

As much as she tried not to appear to be too deep, or too sentimental, as she let down her bravado, when she did, the sincerity was even more disarming.

This was one of those times; it would be easy to portray her as an almost illiterate self-parodying porn star with hillbilly roots, but it would be the most unkind of injustices to ignore her instinctive drives for finding and nurturing  true friendship, and her own fierce loyalty, as well as her hidden wisdom of the moon.

Nonetheless, everybody, including Rebel groaned loudly at the re-overworked cliche, before suddenly becoming silent, touched by her aura, or whatever you might be inclined to use to describe the ambience of that moment , (but that’s just it, even trying now to scratch the surface of the transcendent with mere words, can never do it justice, so there….perhaps you may even be inclined to use your imagination; after all, you didn’t just start reading this as if you were an empty vessel, right?).

Jed continued. “I would not advise anyone to consider taking ‘The Knowledge’ with anyone other than close, trusted friends, at least for the first time. I realize that puts Chiana at a distinct disadvantage, and although there is no sort of competition in any of this, I would be remiss not to at least recognize that five of us have known each other for years, even if it has been a long time since Elliott was a part of our group.”

“As much as I sincerely want to share this experience with Chiana, I am compelled to offer her a ‘pass’ if she is uncomfortable in any way with any of us, because if she is, it will come out eventually.”

“At best, you be challenged by the sheer magnitude of the experience in general. I don’t mean to sound condescending, so please understand me on this point. As we progress into this experience, you will see each of us like an open book, and we will be able to read you just as well.” Jed was soft and sincere in his approach.

“Some people are not prepared to accept some of the truths about themselves that they may have been trying to either deny or pray not to have to acknowledge.”

“Then again, as far as those aspects of our psyche’s are concerned, like either falsies, heel-lifts or a toupee, most of the time, the only person that is fooled  is the the one who thinks that anybody else is.” Rebel chimed in with her characteristically droll and bucolic ease.

Rebecca’s native intelligence had taught her that most people don’t have the attention span of a gnat unless you weave your real message into a conversation about sex, money, drugs, or human politics.

(But she also admitted that she would occasionally test her listeners by protracting the conversation even farther by exaggerating her drawl. She often made her friends ‘prove’ themselves to be worthy to an extent that drove off all but a select few, because once you made it past her radar, she was as generous and passionately loyal as a pit-bull.)

Once again, Jed found himself completely absorbed in Chiana as he stared into her eyes with a tenderness and affection that would have betrayed his true feelings, were it not for the fact that everyone, including Elliott was very much aware of not only his infatuation with her, but her infatuation with him as well.

“By the end of the day, you will see each of our identities dissolve to the point where you may feel that you can’t tell where you end, or where I begin. You will see yourself in each of us, as well as each of us in you.” Leigh-Ann once again took control of the conversation as it became evident that Jed had lost his bearings and was adrift in his own revery.

“Looks like it could be starting already…” she chuckled and shook her head.

“Hey! You two haven’t been dipping into ‘The Knowledge’ without us, have you?”

“…You know I’m kidding, right?” she added.

“Because what you are feeling right now isn’t a splinter compared to a Sequoia, once ‘The Knowledge’ begins to take over…Jed already knows that, so I can only assume that he is simply adrift in fantasy.”

“But before we get too intellectual about all this, I just wanted to add that at some point, you will recognize that ‘The Knowledge’ is going to re-arrange the Table of Contents in your brain.”

“What I mean by that is this: as long as the neurons are healthy and undamaged, every experience, every sensation, every word to which you have been exposed remains in your brain. This includes an unbelievable amount of seemingly trivial minor details, as well as horrific details you may have tried to bury. Without reinforcement, including recall, the connection pathways grow very faint.”

“The Knowledge will eventually index, categorize, and cross-reference EVERYTHING in a way that allows you to intuitively connect all relevant data and information flawlessly and seamlessly in less time than it will take your thinking mind to narrate this message to yourself.” Leigh-Ann paused for a moment to let it all sink in.

“And as we spend time together, we eventually learn everything that each of us used to possess singularly.” Amy and Jeannette (aka Rebecca [Seele], aka Rebel) were speaking in perfect unison and pitched harmony as they jumped into the conversation.

“Hi! We’re the Rogers Twins, and we’ll be here all week.” (The most remarkable aspect being that Amy’s voice was now coming out of Rebel’s mouth.)

“Be sure to try the veal and the sweetbreads, and don’t forget to tip your waitress…” (Similarly, Rebel’s voice now was coming from Amy).

Everyone laughed, but Amy and Rebecca made it clear that some, if not most of the effects were not only essentially permanent, but also cumulative.

“And this here is one thing I think you will especially appreciate, Doc…there is nothing like fuckin’ somebody you really like, and have them suddenly turn into you…it’ll teach you a thing or two about the difference between true love, self-love and narcism.” Rebel’s words were more deliberate than protracted as she shyly winked at Elliott.

“So what do you say we take this dog and pony show on the road? As China spoke, she arose to look each of them deeply in the eyes as she alternately smirked or winked at each of them, but it was the way that she rotated and slightly raised her shoulder as she leaned into first Elliott, and then Jed, caressing their lips with her middle finger to beckon them as she started to walk away for three very exaggerated steps before turning to look backwards over her shoulder, raising her eyebrows as if looking over a pair of sunglasses that spoke volumes to attest to the fact that China was clearly more than ready…at least so far.

 

 

Namasté

नमस्ते

Chazz Vincent

10/12/2018

 

Thought for Today: 10/02/2018

Posted in Crazy Zen Wisdom, Dangerous and Unsavory ideas that are possibly harmful to the weak-mided and overly simplistic and religious, Much Too Good For Children, Observations of a Recovering Buddhist, Possibly Dangerous to Everyone on October 3, 2018 by dreamlanddancing

If you can summons from within yourself the ecstasy, wonderment and rapture of a zealot, there is no need to invoke a deity in your own image. 

…Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei 

…さよなら絶望先生

(Goodbye, Master of Despair)

 

 

Namasté

नमस्ते

Chazz Vincent

10/02/2018

PS: (This is not to be confused with writhing in bed screaming “Oh God! I’m coming!)

Quandary

Posted in Crazy Zen Wisdom, Dangerous and Unsavory ideas that are possibly harmful to the weak-mided and overly simplistic and religious, Letting Go, Observations of a Recovering Buddhist, Possibly Dangerous to Everyone on July 28, 2018 by dreamlanddancing

 

What do you do when you find yourself anesthetizing yourself against the discomfort of daily life?…the Pain of being Human?

It is the mantle we embraced when we traded our Instinct for Reason.

Whether it’s because of an unloving or narcissistic spouse, a job that seems to suck the life from you, disobedient or disrespectful children, indebtedness that threatens to drown you, or even writer’s block, the only person standing between you and your own happiness is you.

I used to work with someone who was constantly complaining about his wife; between alienation of affection, selfishness, and constant, nagging criticism, I often found myself vacillating between feeling pity and annoyance at the endless suffering he endured.

Then suddenly, he missed three days work. When he returned he looked more miserable than ever and later admitted had been drunk the entire time, despondent that his wife had left him.

“I don’t know what to do” he moaned.

“Be grateful” I offered.

“What?! he snapped. “I thought you were my friend…what kind of insensitive prick would say such a thing to anyone in my situation?”

“Let her go” I replied.

“I can’t…I love her too much” were the only words he could mange to choke out before he started to weep again.

As I recalled our previous conversations that inevitably centered around his misery, I found it would have been difficult not to laugh at his last remark, were it not for the compassion I felt for his suffering.

“Then be happy for her, and grateful that she won’t be spending all your money and cuckolding you any more.”

“But she says she’s in love with someone else.”

“Well, at least that would explain her behavior, and why she was such a bitch as she was to you… You should be glad; that also means she won’t be fucking up your next opportunity to be happy for once, and do whatever you want to do.”

“If she’s rally in love with someone else, she will leave you alone…Hell, when a cat gets bored with torturing a mouse, they usually kill it. If she has something new to take her attention away from her love of dominating and torturing you I’d say you got off easy.”

“She says I’ll never find anyone like her again, and I’m afraid she’s right.”

“Don’t be afraid…you should wish she’s right…make her put it in writing,”

“You know, you can be a real insensitive prick when you want to. Have no no feelings for my suffering?”

“What you don’t realize is that I have felt sorry for you for a very, very long time…don’t talk to me about suffering…you have made all your real friends suffer for far too long, watching your misery at the hands of that horrible bitch.”

“I know you don’t want to hear it, but you were the one who taught her to treat you that way.”

“Well, you’re certainly right about that! I don’t want to hear about it…”

“Think about it…as long as she withheld acknowledgement of her satisfaction, she had power over you; so the more of a bitch she was, the harder you tried to please her, all the while ignoring your needs. You need someone who enjoys giving as much as receiving, if in fact you really NEED anybody as much as you did…be glad for your freedom.”

“But I love her too much to let her go.”

“That’s how you taught her to hate you…how can you respect anyone who lets themselves do what she has done to you?…tell me something, do you really love her…would you be willing do anything for her happiness?”

“Yes.”

“Then let her go…in peace, so she doesn’t have any more excuses for hating you for making her feel guilty for being happy. You two could have been friends if you hadn’t made yourself so pathetic.”

Every hungry woman dreams of the whipping post…every slave embraces their collar.

Whether it’s your spouse, your job, your parents, your friends, or even your neighbors, there comes a time when you have to choose to not only recognize, but also accept the reality of your present circumstances.

Most people do not. They may complain, but not usually to anyone who might have the ability to change anything. They may practice some sort of sullen, resentful non-compliance or argue and criticize, but they rarely take action, speak up, or leave.

There is always an excuse that they claim prevents them from doing so, but more accurately, it allows them to continue to wallow in the interlocking series of lies and self-deceptions that constitute the fabric of the eternal suffering that provides them with their identity.

Each of our lives contains an essential enigma; a paradox so central to our being that if we could even recognize it, we might be closer to resolving it.

Suffering is an inevitable quotient of life, but denial and self-deception prevent us from realizing the wisdom needed to find the acceptance and surrender that can lead us to true freedom.  

And that excuse is at the very heart of their problem, which is inevitably unsolvable because of the fact that it has to be, because without it, there would be nothing to prevent them from facing the Great Existential Void.

And whether it’s drugs, or alcohol, or even meditation, they wallow in whatever it is that will prevent them from facing the enigma that lies at the heart of their existence.

It has been with them from the beginning of time, long before their parents’ parents were born; it is what keeps bringing them back.

Lifetime after lifetime.

 

 

 

 

 

Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei.

Sukina Bava.

Namasté

नमस्ते

Chazz Vincent

07/28/2018

 

Once in a Blue Agave Moon; A Convergence of Many Things, Pt. IX, chapter 26

Posted in Dangerous and Unsavory ideas that are possibly harmful to the weak-mided and overly simplistic and religious, Liason Between Parties, Much Too Good For Children, Once in a Blue Agave Moon, Possibly Dangerous to Everyone on July 28, 2018 by dreamlanddancing

 

“Does anybody else want to address the giant elephant in the room?” Chiana had a feeling that she would be the best person to start the conversation.

“Please do.” said Elliott about the same time that Jed affirmed his support.

“What’s next?” she enquired. “I think we are in agreement about where this is heading, right?” 

They both immediately confirmed her suspicion.

“Well, perhaps the most obvious and pressing question  is whether we want to take it to the next step now. I don’t want Jed to have to be too frustrated, considering his present condition.”

Jed was the first to respond. “As delicious as this feels, believe it or not, I’m enjoying the tension…after all, we’ll only know this state of indeterminacy once…I want you so bad I won’t even try to put it into words, and yet…it’s the not knowing…it’s the anticipation that I started feeling the minute I laid eyes upon you that has me worked up in a way that I haven’t known in a very, very long time.”

“Isn’t that kind of painful? Chiana asked.

“If you mean ‘blue balls’ no… That may be a teenage condition, but it hasn’t affected me in many years.”Jed replied.

“I find it hard to believe that there are too many times you have to wait…that women don’t want to fuck you right away….” she quipped.

“Ahhh…good point, Chiana. When you put it that way, I suppose you’re right” he admitted.

“But this feels very different…and I have a reason for wanting to wait. It’s the ‘Fruit of the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil’…and Tantric.”

Jed was feeling he needed to explain more.

“The Fruit is the most singularly amazing and powerful experience I have ever known…it makes acid seem pale by comparison, even though it is overall a much more gentle and natural drug, and doesn’t leave you with that shattered feeling that LSD can invoke.”

“And Tantric will just magnify the entire experience. Believe it or not, as much as I desire you right now, ‘The Fruit’ will change the way you see the world forever, and I am absolutely sure that we will all know when the time is right, and in the meantime…the waiting…the anticipation is positively breathtaking.”

“I want us all to take it tomorrow together.”

Jed suddenly realized that he and Chiana had been talking as if Elliott wasn’t even in the room about the same time that Chiana did.

They both suddenly turned their attention to Elliott and blurted out “How do you feel about all this?” at the same instant, which seemed a bit disarming to Elliott, who thought to himself (“Shit! They’re already finishing each other’s sentences! Why don’t I feel threatened?”)

“We seem to be of one mind…I love you both so much that as much as all of this might be most people’s worst nightmare, I feel exhilarated beyond words…I hope I don’t end up regretting all this, but wherever this takes us, our destinies are inescapable. Here we are. Here and now.”

It had been years since Elliott and Chiana had bothered to take the time to practice Tantric Sex. It’s so easy to become lazy and jaded when you are with the same person for so long. It seems like there’s always tomorrow, and you end up taking each other for granted without ever realizing it.

They spent the rest of the night until well after dawn just touching, kissing and caressing each other. 

Suddenly, every moment was supercharged and hung heavy in the air with portent and significance. Every touch, every sight, glance, sound or nuance was filled with an excitement none of them had known before.

All in all, it felt like everything was exactly the way it was supposed to be.

At least for now; for this present moment, this was all there was.

Of course, This is all there ever is.

 

Namasté

नमस्ते

Chazz Vincent

07/27/2018

Once in a Blue Agave Moon: A Convergence of Many Things Part VIII

Posted in Dangerous and Unsavory ideas that are possibly harmful to the weak-mided and overly simplistic and religious, Much Too Good For Children, Once in a Blue Agave Moon, Polyamory, Possibly Dangerous to Everyone on March 7, 2018 by dreamlanddancing

Chapter 25

Although their kitchen, dining room, pantry and bath was built around their first trailer, which was finally bolstered with a rough-hewn log-cabin exterior, their living quarters were constructed from salvaged freight containers like the ones used on trucks, trains and steamships.

It was not immediately apparent from the outside because they had installed windows and doorways, although they had saved the cut-out portions and made them into shutters and the exterior was covered with wood siding. The doors were similarly made from the cut-outs, and edged with steel. In a minimal amount of time, they could be secured as tight as a bank vault and were at the very least, hurricane-proof.

Similarly, the interiors were paneled and either carpeted or tiled, and the ceilings were constructed from thick foam insulation that simply looked like a textured white ceiling.

Elliott had constructed wooden walkways between all of their buildings and the walkways were covered to provide shelter from either sun or rain.

It is interesting to note that the melaleuca tree was brought to Florida in an effort to dry up the parts of the Everglades that were too wet to grow sugar. Unfortunately, they became an almost uncontrollable invasive species.

Elliott decided to use a very narrow stand of melaleuca to surround their property because it grows so closely and forms such a dense barrier that it provided privacy as well as a wind-break and generally formidable barricade.

It was also useful for keeping the somewhat boggy land around their property dry. It is however a very formidable menace because of its extremely invasive nature, and Elliott quickly learned to keep it confined to only the perimeter of their property.

Fortunately, tonight it also provided them the privacy to walk to the living quarters as naked as jaybirds without being seen by their neighbors.

Not that any of them were especially shy, but it was clearly none of anybody else’s business.

The two containers used for their living space were stacked crossways on top of each other, The bottom container was set up as a very spacious and grand parlor and living room, with a staircase built up to the top container which housed their bedroom.

The bedroom also opened out onto a balcony that ran along the entire side of the upper container, providing a cover for the areas under it.

Their bed was a California King. Sleeping six adults on it was probably unrealistic at best, but Amy and Rebel promptly passed out in each others arms, and Leigh-Ann volunteered to go downstairs to sleep on the couch, leaving Elliott in the same quandary as when she first arrived.

As he stopped to think about it, he realized that, even years ago, when they had been so close, no matter how cheerful or enthusiastic she was, she was strangely aloof about showing her truly genuine feelings. She could be very affectionate, but she kept all her emotional cards very close to her chest.

No matter how much they had loved each other, they never proclaimed to be in love with each other. Then again, they had never quarreled, and never really broke up, although the last time she came back to Florida, she had told him that she wanted to see him one more time, just to confirm that she could be faithful to the man she intended to marry when she returned to Arizona.

She was, at least back then, but for about the last ten years, she and her husband never traveled or vacationed together. She made it no secret, but she did not elaborate beyond that.

He found it strangely flattering, to be her litmus-test for fidelity, but he sometimes wondered if things might have been different if she hadn’t left. Neither of them had wanted her to join the ranks of ex-wives and the animosity they carried, but they both admitted they had thought about it more than once over the years.

But for now at least, it seemed there would be bigger fish to fry.

There was still plenty of room for Chiana to nestle herself between Jed and Elliott.

Although she put her head on Elliott’s shoulder, she rather casually let her hand slid from her hip to Jed’s belly before slowly moving it down to his noticeably rigid cock.

First, just a light touch as she curiously dragged a finger along its length before slowly grasping it, palm down as she sighed deeply enough  for Elliott to notice.

That moment hung in the air as if charged with St. Elmo’s Fire. Elliott turned his head just enough to observe her hand before lightly kissing her on the top of her head. He wanted her to know that she had his understanding, support, and approval.

Jed responded by rolling to his side to face Chiana, but kept his hands to himself. As aroused as he was at that moment, he wanted to be sure he did not overstep any of Elliott’s boundaries, but suspected that at that moment he probably could not have overstepped any of Chiana’s, even if he tried, and he would have been correct in his assumption.

Everyone was enjoying the delicious tension it created.

That was the way it had always been with them, and Elliott knew that whatever he gave, she always returned many times over, but this was going to represent a much greater emotional risk than ever before.

It was time to face his demons; he despised jealousy in any form, most especially in himself. He had loved and trusted Jed like a brother, and clearly understood Chiana’s attraction for him.

This would be his greatest leap of faith ever.

Namasté

नमस्ते

Chazz Vincent

03/06/2018

Once in a Blue Agave Moon: A Convergence of Many Things, Part VII, Chapter 24

Posted in Dangerous and Unsavory ideas that are possibly harmful to the weak-mided and overly simplistic and religious, Much Too Good For Children, Once in a Blue Agave Moon, Polyamory, Possibly Dangerous to Everyone on February 18, 2018 by dreamlanddancing

 

This evening was turning into an increasingly surreal scene. Six adults, all of them nude, with the most provocative histories becoming increasingly intoxicated by way of ethanol and cannabis.

It was a strange mixture of curiosity, friendship, apprehension, attraction, reservations, desires, and nostalgia (from a Greek term meaning “the pain of remembering”).

There was a distinctly playful caution about the evening.

“At the risk of being a buzz-kill, I would like to make a suggestion.” Jed’s words got everyone’s attention to the point where they all looked as if suddenly frozen, like a snapshot, if only for a few seconds. “It has been a long ride to get here, and thanks to your gracious hospitality, we are now clean, exquisitely well-fed, and quite twisted by virtue of not only your now-famous Blue Agave Moon, but also the Dragon Drops, resulting in what is now truly the Perfect Margarita.”

“I’ll drink to that!” quipped Amy, who then promptly passed out.

“Well, I’d say that may have made my next point more concisely and eloquently that I could have hoped” Jed acknowledged.

“But as much as I might wish this night would never end, I have a feeling we will all benefit from a good night’s rest. I don’t think that I would be assuming too much to at least hope that we are all interested in pursuing our new alliance to the next level, so to speak…” Jed paused for just long enough for Chiana to blurt out “And I’ll drink t that!” suddenly realizing she may have sounded a bit too over-anxious, causing her to blush once again, although Elliott smiled, winked knowingly and blew her a kiss.

Experience had taught Elliott that whenever Chiana was given the opportunity to explore her desires, what he got back in return far exceeded his wildest expectations, and considering the odds already being in his favor, he already knew she needed all the encouragement she could get.

But he would have been less than perfectly honest not to admit he did feel a slight twinge at the prospect of facing whatever insecurity he had about the prospect of the already inevitable likelihood of his wife fucking his best friend.

Elliott took a deep breath and savored this poignantly exhilarating emotion he was feeling. It always reminded him of just how dearly he loved Chiana,  and how grateful he was to know her so completely.

“So to continue, I would like to propose that whatever our intentions, we are to let them simmer just long enough to allow us to rest for the remainder of the evening…” as Jed spoke, he was sure to make eye contact with everyone else before turning his gaze to Chiana.

“And I will second that” Elliott volunteered. “I’m not suggesting that we shouldn’t continue to enjoy each other’s company, but as you all know, I have always been an advocate of Tantra, and considering how long it’s been for some of us, one more night will  only help enhance the inevitable.”

“Besides, tomorrow is Samhain, a Blue Moon, and a Blood Moon. This is an extremely rare occasion, and very powerful Mojo…Rebecca can back me up on this…as far as Wicca is concerned, it doesn’t get much better than that. As impatient as I sometimes get with Elliott about Tantric enhancing these experiences, he’s right as rain” Chiana turned to Rebel, who was trying to gently wake Amy, as she nodded in agreement.

“So speakin’ of which, where should we head to sleep this one off?” Rebel was probably as drunk as Amy, and Leigh-Ann was already attempting to assist both of them.

“Follow me” Chiana almost purred as she spoke. “Anyone who wants a separate bedroom is welcome to help themselves to the one next to ours, but there is more than enough room for everyone in our bed. We can tease and play for as long as we want ’til we all pass out, but I have a feeling that won’t be too long…” with that, Chiana turned to lead them next door to their lodging; she was almost embarrassed by how provocatively she swayed her hips as she lead the way. She hoped Jed was paying attention.

He was.

 

 

 

Namasté

नमस्ते

Chazz Vincent

02/17/2018

Once in a Blue Agave Moon: A Convergence of Many Things, Part V, Chapter Twenty-Two

Posted in Dangerous and Unsavory ideas that are possibly harmful to the weak-mided and overly simplistic and religious, Margarita, Much Too Good For Children, Once Upon a Blue Agave Moon, Possibly Dangerous to Everyone on January 13, 2018 by dreamlanddancing

 

Elliott next produced a large growler of remarkably clear, dark green liquid. He held it aloft for dramatic effect with the flourish of a circus ringmaster.

“Ladies and gentleman…I bring you the famed Dragon Drops. While Absinth may be known as ‘The Green Fairy’ it would be better to regard my Dragon Drops as ‘The Green Monster’.

He revolved slowly as he spoke to make eye contact with everyone in the dining room, just a pleased as a proud father of a newborn child as he continued.

“I began the mash with cattail root and sugar beets to make the mash which was so sweet that it required very little sugar, and brewed it in a two-stage fermentation process using first a champagne yeast, which is highly alcohol resistant, followed by a very bright ale yeast that I fortified with Vegemite, and Barr’s Liquid Amino acids to additionally nourish the yeast cells. Back when you could buy it commercially, they called it ‘Turbo Yeast’. All the brew-related yeasts are very difficult to obtain so I now keep batches of both growing continually, much like a sourdough culture.”

As he continued, he lowered the bottle until it was cradled in his left arm, as one might hold an infant.

“The final pitched wort was almost twenty percent alcohol by weight…not twenty proof, which is only ten percent…but twenty percent equals forty proof; as strong as a fortified wine, ‘like Mad Dog 20/20’.

Elliott clearly loved an audience, especially this one, and he had their total and undivided attention.

“By using a thumper during the distillation process, it is for all intents and purposes double distilled and yields approximately one hundred and fifty proof on the first pass, which represents seventy-five percent alcohol by weight. The second pass yields about ninety-five percent alcohol, or one hundred and ninety proof…almost pure alcohol.”

He stopped for just a moment for effect as Jed whistled and Amy reacted with a “yikes!”.

“Remember Everclear? Just about the same thing, except my version is still alembic, or ‘pot-distilled’, rather than column-distilled, like most commercial vodkas, which strips most of the taste from it” he added.

Rebel, almost dead-pan most of the time, seemed to be enjoying a bit of nostalgia as her normally sloe-eyed expression betrayed a faint smile. Most men never noticed these moments because they were usually too preoccupied with staring at her gigantic tits. This often allowed her to indulge herself to stretch out her few words so slowly that it was like waiting for ketchup to pour.

“My Daddy blew up his still trying to make a batch of ninety proof. I used to beg him not to drink when he was cookin’ but he was one hard-headed som’bitch who thought he already knew more than any woman could ever learn, and saw no reason to heed the words of a thirteen year old girl.”

With that, a dark cloud passed over her face as she said “It cost that dirty bastard his life…as much as I loved him, I can’t say I missed him being drunk all the time and sneaking into my bedroom after Momma fell asleep…the night before he got killed was the last time he ever fucked me….”

Suddenly, the sound of several crickets outside doing their two-legged sonata of the ‘Ode to a Woolen Sweater’ seemed much louder than before.

“Every year on the anniversary of his death, I would go to the grave site and wait ’til no one was around, and piss on his grave…what stage of the grieving process do you think that would that fall under, Doc?”

“Revenge and Reconciliation…that’s one you won’t find in any books, but sometimes it is necessary…and certainly justifiable, if you ask me, my dear Lola.”

The pall that fell over the room was suddenly so dark that it seemed like the temperature in the room had fallen ten degrees. Whether you knew her as Rebel, Rebecca, or Jeanette, any tears shed by her in front of anyone were far more rare than either fossilized chicken teeth or copies of “Self-Defense and Marksmanship for Democrats (and other Dummies).”

As Amy wiped away the solitary tear, Elliott kissed her on the forehead.

“At the risk of sounding insensitive, I believe you were telling us about the Dragon Drops…?” Leigh-Ann was sometimes more passionate than most, but she had an uncanny knack for keeping almost any situation on track.

Elliott continued. “Well, extracting decarboxylated THC requires at least seventy-five percent ethanol to work best, and once I added the other ingredients to help mask the somewhat grassy taste that the marijuana left, I wanted to be sure that the resulting mixture wasn’t excessively diluted.”

“As it is, the orange tincture tastes much like Cointreau, and is usually about one hundred and ten proof, or fifty-five percent alcohol. The lime tincture is made from soaking crushed Key Limes, which grow all over the property in the same one hundred and ten proof alcohol, plus a fair amount of simple sugar syrup (which we also make here) but the alcohol content of the lime tincture is about ninety proof.”

“In short, Dragon Drops enable us to make a perfect top-shelf Margarita that contains enough Tetrahydrocannabinol to equal the effect of smoking about a half-gram of the finest Kush (which we also grow here).”

“I do not recommend more than four, unless you wish to experience something approximating an acid trip. I have considered diluting the Dragon Drops a little, but I rarely drink more than two of these in an evening. It has been many years since I would drink half a liter of tequila shooters in one sitting….”

“Thank God for that! I remember those days…and not especially fondly.”

Leigh-Ann was the first to volunteer an opinion, which was quickly seconded and re-affirmed by everyone except Chiana.

“It sounds like I should be grateful for that.” she said.

“Let me put it this way…” Amy winced slightly as she spoke. “Elliott was never what I would call a ‘mean drunk,’ but he could get to be very reckless to the point of being dangerous, and well….”

“A real asshole…not mean, just stupid.” Rebel interjected. “…No disrespect intended, Doc.”

“And none taken, but OK, we get your point. Even sober I still have fairly shitty judgment, and if I wasn’t one of the luckiest people on the planet, I would have been dead years ago.”  Elliott laughingly conceded.

“So who wants Margaritas?” he asked.

Chazz Vincent

01/13/2018

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